Depression - find a better way forward

‘I can’t see the point in trying to feel better’ 

Thats the depression talking to you. The low mood and lethargy are telling you that trying to do anything is pointless. Its safer and easier to stay away from everything as you won’t feel better anyway. This is the negative thinking that keeps you trapped and stops you trying anything, but thoughts aren’t facts and you need to stop listening to them as though they are true.

Everyone has depression at some point in their lives, it is a common and universal experience. It might be because of difficult events that have happened or perhaps more difficult to cope with, you seem to have regular bouts of debilitating low mood. It can also occur after a period of anxiety and often the two go together. The stress of anxiety starts to lower your mood and you find it easier to withdraw from everything and avoid situations. 

In the past, you may have suffered bullying, abuse and poor treatment from people who should have been looking after you. You might be feeling trapped in a difficult job, marriage or relationship, or have a strong caring role that uses up all your emotional and physical resources. All of these situations can lead to a cycle of low mood that you can become resigned to and you find it hard to challenge yourself to make changes that will help.

The real truth is that you do need to do things to change the depression. Other people will try to help but they can only bear so much negative mood especially if you become irritable with them or refuse to try anything different. Blaming others, the world and unfairness is a way of avoiding the fact whatever caused it, you have to start in slow small steps to change it. 


Things you can try to change this Downward Spiral.

  1. Visit your GP, medication really might be needed and can be an option at any point. 

  2. Tell a sympathetic person.

  3. Counselling - privately available or free NHS IAPT service

  4. Listen to good ideas from other people

  5. Mind - look up local resources 

  6. Make yourself do one positive thing to help yourself each day

  7. Get dressed, out of bed. It’s a start

  8. Any exercise helps mood, even a short walk.

  9. Battle and Argue with the negative thoughts.

  10. Samaritans provide a listening service to those in despair and can suggest actions.

  11. Seek urgent medical help if you feel suicidal.


Many people with low mood and depression decide to wait until they feel better before they do something. With depression this is not useful, you have to start to do things and tolerate not feeling your great. Your mood will change and improve. At least try this as an experiment and don’t expect a sudden change, just start taking small steps each day.

© Susan Thurlow February 2019